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journey into the past. [12 Aug 2010|03:50am] i was just looking through some of the things i wrote about 5 years ago. there was still a sense of desire in it (my writing), something that makes me feel like despondency was just another moment, however prolonged it was, much like happiness and love. it's not that beauty (in nature) is all i can appreciate anymore, but it's all that i can find hope in. send love

if dying is strange and hard, and death is a part of life, then what is life? [13 Jul 2010|10:04pm] it has been almost three years since i've used this. i'm getting so old. ashley and i both have our associates degrees and are moving on to our respective majors to acquire a b.a. that means there are only a couple of years left in buffalo until we move back to philly and start teaching. yes, teaching. i'm still trying to come to terms with the fact that i am now at the age where i'm supposed to have a career and know what i am doing, because no one ever really knows what they're doing. i still write, but classes have caused the time i spend writing to be diminished. i know my word will probably never be anything, and that doesn't bother me, but i wish we didn't have roles in life. i don't want to be just an english teacher in philadelphia. i never will be. i don't think that can be understood sometimes, though, especially by a complete stranger. some things can only be identified by what we know. the sun is the center of our universe, and everything revolves around it. that is all we know in general, and our scope of understanding is so limited that it really begs the question: is rational thought a blessing or a curse? it's hard to accept that the generations of the 90s and 00s are over. more people i know are dying, and the world seems cheaper once they are gone. one day i'll join them. until then, i suppose i'll keep feeling more and more out of place. send love

whoaaaaaaa..... [16 Jul 2007|03:33am] [ mood | blank ] i almost forgot about this (livejournal) again. i'm looking for a new job. i'm coming out of a writer's block, which was odd. it was sort of a subconscious writer's block. i didn't even realize i had stopped writing until weeks after it had actually occured. that's a bit uneasing, but i'm moving past it now. i love buffalo. but everywhere gets old. and some of the kids here and old friends are just... eh. no offense to them, but i'm sick of everyone being so scattered. everywhere. send love

whoaaaaaaaaa [27 May 2007|01:06am] [ mood | awake ] i have a livejournal that i forgot about. so i'm happy to be back in buffalo. fuck pennsylvania. i have a job screen printing at great arrow graphics. my birthday is... technically, tomorrow. yeah. awesome. send love

in the doldrums [26 Mar 2006|09:59pm] [ mood | drained ] i got beads to make bracelets. i'm getting free pants tomorrow. yeah. um, i don't really want to be in harrisburg anymore. but shit happens. send love

new avatar [16 Mar 2006|01:43am] yes, i have a new avatar. jay from orchid. you know, the best band to ever have existed. send love

work [01 Mar 2006|12:26am] [ mood | tired ] i work a lot. the end. send love

[29 Jan 2006|01:32am] [ mood | tired ] i got off work to see circletakesthesquare next sunday. awesome. yeah, that it for now. i haven't updated in forever. send love

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